For the longest time I thought I was so “unlucky”. I haven’t found a man I wanted to spend my life with. I wasn’t married. I didn’t have children. But now, I consider my singlehood a great blessing.

I became good with money

The years alone taught me how to manage my finances. I filed my own taxes. Fixed my own plumbing. I dealt with lawyers and property agents. I had no second income to fall back on so I was forced to be savvy with my budget. I paid off my home as a singleton. It can be done, women.

I learnt to be happy in my own skin

I became an expert in myself. I couldn’t hide or bury my needs or desires in another person. I had the time and the mental space to figure out what I really wanted from life and people, and thus what I want from a partner.

I dared to take risks

Yes, this is the biggest benefit of being single and I happily embrace it without guilt. Because I didn’t have dependents and didn’t have to think about a kid who is going through college one day, I changed careers, moved to Australia. You get the drift.

I became a better version of myself

All that time! Yes, we singletons do have a lot of it. Don’t spend it moaning about the lack of a boyfriend. Spend it travelling, learning and creating things instead. It’s a privelege many women in the past have fought for and longed for, so we shouldn’t take it for granted.

Yes, I’ve become fussier in choosing my life partners because I know what I want and  I can afford to. I’m very lucky to live in an age where women can work and thus lead independent lives. If not for this, I’d be forced to compromise in order to survive.

Being happy single, I believe, is very crucial to happiness – especially in a marriage. 

Because when you’re happy single, you learn that your own happiness does not come from another person. You develop skills for self-fulfilment, contentment and happiness. You learn to be happy alone. So, when you finally find a partner, you’ll complement him rather than expect him to fill a hole in you. Because that won’t be fair to your partner.

If you’re in a hurry to find a significant other, perhaps you need to slow down and be single for a while. Perhaps you need to stare at that hole in you and ask yourself: Do you really need another person to fill it up?